Place of Desperation

How many of us have experienced a Place of Desperation? It’s that place where you’re left crying out because you need the Lord to “show up or else.”
I’ve been thinking a lot about all my points of desperation in my life so far and every single one of them has ended in the Lord’s incredible response.

My husband and I were talking the other day about life and all it brings. He asked the question, “Why do some receive and others don’t? What’s the deciding factor to each side?” That’s a hard one and it never has a concrete answer; sometimes there is no answer. My best response is that we are all on our own journey. We can’t look to the left, right, in front or behind because as soon as we do, we will compare our journey to what we see of others’ journeys. Comparison will kill everything. I also believe on our journey, it is in our response. How are we responding to Him? Are we settling our responses to our circumstances or are we raising our responses to the purpose for which we are called? Our current reality doesn’t look much like what we’re called to do, but we are choosing to respond in our calling and not our current storm.
Like I said, it can’t and won’t be concrete. We have to allow Holy Spirit to move and bend us in this path we’re on or we get stuck. Stuck in frustration and in our desperation for immediate response.

I have experienced plenty of trials in my life that have brought crippling suffocation and darkness where all I could utter was “Help me”. Each time He showed up and showed out miraculously. Those “boosts” were never “pain free”, but they began healing and movement that I needed and sight given to see His love and miraculous nature. There will be times when you know you’re responding, but you will have to walk through time of healing, waiting and refining that needs to come before He can walk you into the next step forward.

I was recently deeply challenged when watching a broadcast from a Facebook friend. He was sharing from Nigeria, Africa about a mother carrying her baby that had just passed away into this crusade. I don’t want to focus on this heartbreak but want you to see her desperation. How desperate are we for the Lord to really move in and through us? Are we so prideful that we hide our brokenness or are we desperately broken, desperately wanting the Lord to use us & move through us? I’m desperate to see the miraculous nature of God manifest not just in my life but in everyone I come in contact with. He is continually wrecking my heart for all that wrecks His. I’m desperate to see His healing manifest all around me, to see others come into His fullness; an awareness of who they are created to be in and through Him. Healing identity crises, healing bodies, minds and souls, mending the broken-hearted, hope to the hopeless and provision to all levels of need. We have the food to feed not just bodies, but food for the souls. When are we going to be overwhelmed with desperation for all those lost and wandering & living in places you can’t even comprehend? Walking broken and desperate into a meeting carrying your dead baby with all hope and desperation for it to be brought back to life?
I’m so beyond my selfish desperation to the point of not caring much about my needs. My God feeds the birds and beasts of this earth everyday; He will supply all my needs. Selfish and self-seeking desires are so shallow and unsatisfying. I’ve been wrecked and cannot go back to anything I knew before this. My desperation now is for all the faces I see when I close my eyes. I see all the lost and wandering souls of this earth and I’m left completely undone.
As you walk through this life, there will eventually be a place you’re heart reaches where it becomes desperate for more. I pray we all reach this specific Place of Desperation.

 

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